@ Whole Foods

I so miss sitting still and spending time journaling, talking with God, writing music, and being alone. Who would have ever guessed that an extrovert such as myself would long for solitude. My college years and the year following it allowed me to have a lot of time to myself...studying, writing, working at the cafe, reading. I loved those times then, but never realized that as we get older and life gets more and more full with things like husbands, babies and "jobs" (quick side note: I say job with bunny ears because it sure doesn't feel like a job! I get to hang out with some of the most amazing ladies I know and have loads of fun and talk about Jesus...so not a job) those alone times become something that we have to work for...they are no longer built in nor easy to come by.

So, here I am, at Whole Foods feeling blessed that my dinner meeting is running late and I am left sitting here...alone. Is it not when we are alone that we truly have the space to face God? Is it not when we are alone that we truly get to face the truth of ourselves?

Now, I don't want to be misunderstood here. I would never ever trade my life today for anything. I have an amazing and challenging marriage, an amazing and challenging child, and an amazing and challenging "job"...perfect. What I am saying here is more a reflection on something my Mama Holland has been talking a lot about these days. As we get older and the responsibilities pile on (marriage, children, jobs, friends, bills, loan payments, insurace, and the list goes on...) somewhere along the way, at some unknow time we start losing ourselves in all the things we become a part of and all the things we spending time doing. I feel rather thankful to have a Mama who can make me aware of such a thing so that 10 years from now I don't look back and wonder where I lost myself. My mom has made me aware that one of the best ways I can take care of others is by taking care of myself and my relationship with God.

So, awareness is only a small part of the equation, right. What's my next step? Such a good question. I used to be the sort that would make five year plans and check lists. These days I follow my husband's advice and focus only on my NEXT STEP. My next step? Guylan wakes up earliest 7:30...so I will be up at 6:45am. I am also going to take Thursday evenings and treat them as a Sabbath. Solitude here I come.

Hope you find time for solitude in your life.

Becky